Forever bike rides.

Today was pretty rad. I mean, It couldve been better but in comparison to most, I couldnt complain if I wanted to. The weather was awesome, and my heart felt a little less weighted, as well as working weekends means I can just slack and give zero fucks about anything. Paul: 1 - Work: 0. When I got home I had this feeling of just wanting to be outside forever. It didn't matter what I was doing, or who I was with - just that my skin felt the spring/summer mixed air. I took my sister out for a bike ride to places that I hadn't been since my Dad used to take me back when we actually gave a shit about doing things together. It didn't even matter that I was using a bike too small for me, or that the tires felt as if they hadn't been used in seasons, or that I didn't even know what to talk to my sister about anymore - we just biked for over an hour. I probably would've gone longer, but I knew she had to be home in time to get ready for bed, and well rested for school tomorrow. It made me realize that I wasted a lot of time in her younger years being selfish and not watching her grow up. She's two years away from highschool, and a blonde-haired, blue eyed athletic girl. Shes two years away from not wanting to go on forever bike rides with her going-nowhere, tattooed brother. Shes two years away from starting her life, really. Its funny, it seems like the more I grow up, the less I want to be apart from watching her come into her own. From watching her meet her first boyfriend, and first day of high school. Im waiting for her first heartbreak the same way I'm waiting for someone to break mine - hoping it never happens, but knowing we're all destined to break. I wish I had been here years ago, helping her through every stage of her life. Been there when she'd call and tell me that she missed me. Been there when I had promised I would. I don't exactly know what this is supposed to mean, but she taught me a lot about time spent, and what being "there" really means.. She's 10 years younger, and still taking me to school the same way she did the day she was born. Tasha, you won't read this, but dont let this world let those blue eyes turn gray. Life is hard, but you're stronger - remember that.